Matthew 14:27-33
“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.” “Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus….”(v.28-28)
This is one of my most favorite stories. And one I feel l can relate to. I always want to be the Peter who trust Jesus so much he actually walks on water. I mean who doesn’t?!

But sometimes I know I’m the peter that doubts. The one that starts walking on the water but the minute the wind blows you lose your faith. Honestly, don’t we all have these moments? Not that it’s one of our most proud moments…but there’s times in our lives that we are overwhelmed, we have everything going wrong, and we just want to give up and we lose our faith. But you know what? That’s when we say Lord, help me have faith. Remind me of your goodness. You call out to the Lord just like in Mark 9 when the boys father proclaims “Lord I believe, but help my unbelief” (v24) Because that is when the Lord comes in and shows Himself to you, when you are weak He is strong. He wants you to call out to Him. He will be there to catch you and lift you up.

Right now I’m in a season of truly trusting the Lord. Trusting Him to completely provide for me. I know He can, and trusting that He will. I’m trusting that when (because even Though I hate to admit it, I know it’s a when not a if) I doubt, He will be right there when I call out to Him to pick me up and show me He has me. That He is the ultimate provider and what He has called me to, He will provide a way.

Asking you to pray with me in this time of trusting our Father to provide. 

“I will go before you and will level the mountains; I will break down gates of bronze and cut through bars of iron. I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the Lord, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.” – Isaiah 45:2-3

God is so good. I can’t even begin to explain His goodness. He told me I had to do something, and honestly I said no. Let me tell you, don’t ever say no to God.
I was beyond nervous, and I didn’t think this conversation was going to go well at all….
To begin, I love my parents very much. I respect them and I never want to disappoint them. I know that they are going to support me in all my decisions. But I was sure what I was going to tell them was it. Who really wants to tell your parents you want to go a prat of the world that is in the news daily? It’s going to be a hard conversation.
Two weeks ago God told me I need to talk to them and tell them what He had told me. I honestly didn’t want to. I had no clue how they would respond. Actually, I feared it wouldn’t be how I wanted. And when God said tell them, I said no. That’s probably not something you should ever tell God.
A week ago God said now. I doubted God. I even almost didn’t tell my parents. BUT GOD. When He gives you something He will go before you. He is teaching me that when He has something for you, He will make a way. The complete opposite happened, this conversation was so good. My parents were so understanding and knew this is what I have to do. They support me in this and are helping me with the planning and everything I need to do in order to make it happen.
God’s plan is not to be messed with. No matter my doubts, no matter my fears, no matter if I tell Him no…He is going to make a way. I’m thankful the Lord gave me the parents He did. Even when hard conversations need to happen, because I know every hard conversation, every moment of my life He is using to mold me into the person He has created so He can use me to bring glory to Him. My Lord is faithful.
You know what funny? God gave me this verse, Isaiah 45:2-3 back in May before He took me to Greece. He knew I would need it. Sometimes His plans take time. And He’s only going to show what He has for you if you show Him you are trustworthy with what He has already given you.
Keep stepping out in faith. The more you step out the more you will know His voice and the more comfortable you get with stepping out.

bold
bōld/

adjective

1. (of a person, action, or idea) showing an ability to take risks; confident and courageous.”a bold attempt to solve the crisis”
2. not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff;courageous and daring:a bold hero.

A couple weeks ago I was talking to God. I asked Him if He would give me a word for this year. A word to live this year. I want this year to be for Him, so what does that look like?

His answer; bold. Live bold.

 Do not let the unknown, the rejection, or the non-understanding-ness (not sure that’s a word-but you get what I’m trying to say…) of others stop you from doing what I called you to do. Don’t let the promises I’ve given you wither away. I have not called you to live a fearful life. Live boldly. Be bold in your decisions.

What does that look like? How do I live boldly? The only way to answer this is to look in His word.

“After they prayed, the place where they were meeting was shaken. And they were all filled with the Holy Spirit and spoke the word of God BOLDLY. All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had.”-Acts 4:31

“For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.” – 2 Timothy 1:6-7

“Therefore, since we have such a hope, we are very bold.”- 2 Corinthians 3:12

I could keep going on examples of what God says about being bold. I am thankful for a Father who not only speaks to me. And when I ask, He answers.
This. This is how I want to live this year. I want my faith to be lived out boldly. God has already told me about some hard conversations that i will need to have. They are not going to be easy. I will have to be bold. But also He has showed me they will be good. If I step out in faith. This is what is coming. Boldness.

Sometimes I’m not sure if my thought process makes sense to others. Today is one of those days. Hope you enjoy and understand what God has given me to write…

“Are there risks to proclaiming the gospel to refugees? Sure there are. But where in the world did we get the idea that Christianity is without risks? Only in Americanized Christianity that prioritizes security in this world over proclamation of Gods word…As followers of Christ, self is no longer our God. Safety is no longer our concern. So let’s show this with our lives…”
“There’s coming a day when sin and suffering will be no more. There’s coming a day when wars and crisis will no longer exist and in this we place confident hope.”
-David Platt, Our Refugee Moment

Last week I listened to a podcast by David Platt. David explains very well exactly what I’ve been feeling lately. Why are we so concerned about our safety? When did we decide that being comfortable and just “making it” is what God wants us to do? Because God never told us to live a safe life. (And if that is in the Bible, could you please send that to me) He tells us to go. He tell us we are going to have trials, it’s going to be hard. (See John 16:33) Something that always bothers me is when I tell people I want to “go” or I am “going” their response is “honey, that’s not a safe country.” Or “you should go somewhere safer.” Excuse me? Is America safe? Not to burst anyone’s bubble, but it’s really not.
I understand being wise in decisions and where you go, but honestly what does a safe place even look like? How are we ever going to spread the Gospel to people who need to hear it if we never get out of our comfort zones of our Christian friends and church homes. Yes you need community, and you need your fellow believers. Community is key. That is not what I am saying. But if we don’t ever take risks in proclaiming the name of Jesus, how will people know we live for Him and His love is real?
If we live for Christ we live with a hope. A hope that so many people a looking for. If you just take a look at what is happening in the world so many people are searching. SO LET US TELL THEM! Why would we want to keep the good news to ourselves? We should want to go and tell others about JESUS. We should want them to have the freedom and forgiveness we have.
Today, there is great opportunity to proclaim the gospel. Let us not sit back. Let us take what God has given us to further His kingdom.

(If you have about 30 minutes I highly recommend listening to this David Platt podcast. It’s through The Gospel Coalition titled “Our Refugee Moment” if you’d like the link, I’d be happy to share.)

Matthew 28:19
Such a simple calling. Such simple instructions.

Jesus tells us to go. He says right in the Bible to love everyone. It doesn’t matter their background, their race, what they believe, or even what country they are from. My favorite line to use is “people who love Jesus aren’t racist.” It’s so true. Because if you truly love Jesus you will have His heart and you will love like Him. Growing up I always asked God to give me His heart…I asked Him to let me love like He loves. I wanted to love His people.
This summer God took me to Greece. It was life changing. I went to love on kids. It wasn’t a hard trip, it actually was more of vacation for me. He took me to rest in Him. And that’s exactly what I did. He showed me I have a heart for kids-working with kids brings me so much Joy. But He showed me I have a heart for a part of the world and a people group that as an American I was raised to not like. He’s slowly revealing to me how these two things will come together.
The question I get and the comments that are said-“Alyssa, I don’t understand how you want to go back to Turkey. You weren’t even there for 24 hours. There’s so much violence. How could you fall in love with a place that you barley spent any time in?”
There is only one logical answer. JESUS.
So how did I fall in love with Turkey when I spent all my time in Greece? Well when God took me to Greece, He took me through the Istanbul airport. And He took me through it 3 days before the attack happened there his summer and 5 days after the attack happened. When I first heard there was an attack at the airport my first reaction was heart break. I never was afraid. I felt odd. Like should I be scared? Should I fear going back? I even asked someone. What I wanted was to go and hug and love those people. Tell them it’s okay, tell them about a HOPE I have. A Hope in a savior who has overcome the world(John 16:33). But what I heard from everyone around me was don’t go back, reroute your flight. It’s not safe. Don’t get me wrong-i understand to be wise in your decisions. I would never claim Jesus’ protection and then run across I-10 thinking I won’t get hit by a car. That is not wise. But I do believe He will call you places that my not be “safe” for the worlds standards but He will be with you. When walking back through the airport as we were leaving I heard Him say, love them. These are my people. Learn about them. And show them who I am. Love them. He showed me how beautiful they are. These people are just people. And He loves them the same as you and me. He placed these people on my heart to love.
I know it’s crazy that an attack on an airport when you weren’t even there can do so much to your life, but again the only explanation I have is JESUS. He wants us to love like He loves and He wants us to spread the gospel to everyone. Everyone is welcome at the table.
I was reminded at church yesterday that sometimes God calls us places that the people around us don’t understand and even though it’s hard to leave the people you love, but you don’t say no to God.
“Ask me, and I will make the nations your inheritance, the ends of the earth your possession.” Psalms 2:8

So I’m asking for the nations, and I’m asking you to ask with me.

Some of you know me. Some of you think you do. Some of you don’t. But either way, what you’re about to read is an important part of who I am.
A year ago, January 2016, I was fed up. I was defeated. I was in pain. I was lonely. I was miserable. And I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know where to go. I wanted community. I wanted friends. I wanted love. I wanted Jesus. And I mean really wanted Jesus. Not just this go to church on Sunday and fake that everything is okay.

I was teaching 6th grade Sunday school, and I was going to church. This I knew I needed. I knew I needed Jesus, but how do I get there?

I grew up in church. Going Sunday’s, Wednesday’s, and every event I could. I could tell you bible story after bible story. I may not know them like some people, but I knew them. Both my uncles are Baptist preachers. This was my life. It’s really all I knew.

But I was hurt by the church. I never felt accepted. I never felt like I had friends. Everyone had their “click” and I wasn’t apart of any of them.

“What was wrong with me? How could I be like them? Why am I so different? If no one talks to me, there has to be something wrong with me.” These are the lasts thoughts someone in a church should be thinking. And when I tried to talk about it to someone or ask someone about why this happens I got told everything was fine. Don’t worry. People like you.

I grew to hate church. The very place you should feel safe and accepted, I felt lonely, hurt, and rejected.

But I continued to go because I knew it’s where I needed to be. I needed community. I wasn’t really getting community because I was teaching 6th so I wasn’t meeting people, well not my age anyway.

And then one Sunday in February I decided to go to attend Sunday school instead of teaching. And God sat a lady next to me who let me be me. She listened to me and she didn’t tell me I was wrong for feeling the way I feel. She invited me to be apart of a discipleship group, and that group has forever changed me. For the first time I felt loved and accepted. These girls let me come in broken and they walked along side me. Their prayer for me, and my prayer for myself was that I would know God loved me. One day I received a text with Zephaniah 3:17, “The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.”

And in that moment, God said, “Alyssa, I love you. I delight in you. You are who I created you to be.” And after all the years I finally believed He loved me. And I came to know who I am in Him. It’s been a journey-it didn’t happen over night. But once I started walking in that, He started shining through me. When you absolutely know you are loved, you’re whole life is different. I could keep telling you how my life is different…here’s a few:

-people became attracted to me, they wanted to be around me.

-I was asked out on a date for the first time (he might have been Turkish, but if you saw him-HELLO!😍😍 and no I didn’t go because I didn’t stay in Turkey. But still.)

-joy became easier to choose

-I started seeing Him in everything

-He started speaking to me, and I could hear Him

-He gave me His heart for His people and I could tell it wasn’t mine

Other than telling you who God is to me-He is a healer and He is good, I’m not sure how else to explain what happened. He is so good, and He loves you. You were created to live with God. You are loved. He wants you to accept His love. I wish everyone “got it” because when you do, life is so great.

 

I am not a writer. I have never liked writing. I have this problem where i have all these thoughts in my head but when I start writing I can’t get them out. But a couple months ago I had this great idea to start a blog. I semi looked into it then thought again. Then one day I was talking to my dad. I was telling him how all I want to do is travel the world and love people in the name of Jesus. He of course thought I was joking. But then he said you should start a blog, joking of course. But something in me said yes, start a blog. So here I am, my 2017 goal-to blog. Whether people read it or not this is my way of continuing listening and stepping out in faith to what the Lord has said to me.

2016 was one of the best years. I had an incredible journey and with that comes a story, but that will be for a later post. But I am going to take what the Lord showed me and bring it into this new year and continue walking in that. Some highlights of last year;

• I begged God for a community and He gave me the best friends

• I started living freely in Him

• He took me to Greece to love on His people

• I fell in love with the Middle East, come on have you ever eaten their food??!!

• I moved out on my own (with two roomies)-and as scary as it was not sure how i would afford it, God has provided!

• I became confident in myself

And there was so much more. I am so thankful to see a new year, and I can’t wait to see where God takes me this year!